Item Writing

Collin Hansen

Mrs. Frasier

Creative writing

1/16/2015

Starbucks Coffee Cup

Yesterday when we went out and searched for items around the school I found a Starbucks cup. I picked it up because it reminded me about white girls. The reason it reminded me of white girls is because stereotypically white girls always end up gathered around Starbucks. Starbucks has successfully taken of the major population of hipsters and white chicks. As far as why white chicks and hipsters gather around Starbucks and spend lots of money on lattes and Cappuccinos I will never know. Coffee isn’t even that great like maybe black coffee but all these people are ordering lattes and spice chi vanilla frap chinos. When and why did a spice chi vanilla frap chino ever come into existence?

                Americans wonder why they have no money…It’s probably because they are spending it on coffee that cost more to drink then to make. You go to Starbucks and pay like 5 dollars for a black coffee which is ridiculous. At least recycle the cup because I found one on the ground which is why I am typing this. People buy at least one cup of coffee a day so take the cup and make art or something just don’t leave it lying around on the ground to get run over or eventually get consumed by some animal that finds it on the side of the road.

                I have never had Starbucks because I only like regular coffee that isn’t 5 dollars a cup. I can go to my grandparents and get free coffee at 0 dollars a cup and drink as many cups as I feel necessary. Plus my grandparent’s coffee is the bomb diggity. Like its off brand coffee but its good which is something to look forward to when you work late and decide to stay the night there instead of driving all the way back to Springfield. Coffee doesn’t need special spice and chemicals in it to make it good. In fact half of what they put in it might possibly kill you maybe, I’m not sure but if I’ve never heard of it I’m not consuming it.

                I need to start like giving white girls and hipsters to go buy coffee from my grandparent’s because their coffee is going to be better than any coffee they will buy at some chain of coffee venders. Plus my grandparents’ coffee isn’t going to have unknown chemicals and spices in it which makes it probably 10 times safer to drink. So to all hipsters and white girls go buy coffee at my grandparents’ house that way you are less likely to ingest toxic coffee spice chemicals and more likely to give my grandparents money. My grandparent’s coffee also would come in a ceramic mug so you won’t have any paper cups to leave lying on the ground or to mess up the beautiful world’s ecosystem because our earth should be clean and coffee cup-less and coffee should not be over spiced or over whip creamed .